Bay Area Houston

Be there! It will be wild!

The Stop the Steal Movement is organizing another rally this time at the Texas Capitol. According to the organizer “The only way they can win is to rig the elections and If you don’t fight like hell you’re not going to have a country anymore. You’ll never take back our country with weakness.”. The first Stop the Steal rally was held in Washington DC and resulted in an attack on the Capitol, the arrest of hundreds, and millions in cleanup costs.

We want Greg Abbott to know that redistricting in the middle of the decade is unconstitutional and we are going to the Capitol, peacefully and patriotically to make our voices heard. You have an opportunity today: You can be a hero, or you can be a zero. And the choice is yours but we are all watching. There is a significant portion of our party that says we should just sit idly by and sit on our hands. They have no backbone. Let’s have trial by combat. Let’s show Greg Abbott that today is the day American patriots start taking down names and kicking ass.

Unlike the rally at the United States Capitol rally goers are discouraged from dressing in riot wear, bringing guns, zip ties, bear spray, or metal poles. Anyone violating these rules will be arrested, prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, and pardoned.

Date and Time TBD. Be there! It will be wild! Welcome to Satire Sunday, a day late.

I did not see this coming

David Hogg, newly appointed Vice Chair of the Democratic National Committee, surprised the Committee and progressives across the party when he announced his plan to primary the members of The Squad. The Squad is composed of 7 of the most progressive members of the Democratic Congress. According to NBC News:

Hogg set off a firestorm among Democrats last week when he said his political action committee would fund a $20 million effort to challenge “ineffective” incumbents in primaries

The Washington InCider continues:

“My job as Vice Chair of the DNC is to find and fund candidates to challenge ineffective Democrats in the House and Senate. My targets may include the members of The Squad including my good friend Alexandria Ocasio Cortez. After years in office AOC and The Squad collectively have accomplished little. They can’t make progress. They can’t forge relationships with others in the Party or across the aisle.”

Hogg went on to say that The Squad has have filed a total of 290 bills, passing only 4. 3 of these bills renamed buildings. The Squad has been very effective in getting media attention, appearing on MSNBC claiming to represent the Party, and complaining about the very party they belong to. Yet when it comes to the hard work of actually making progress on progressive issues they have been silent.

“We need young Democrats to file and challenge the members of The Squad. They need to learn the art of being a politician. Anyone can yell and scream about progressive issues we are passionate about but it takes a politician to actually make progress. Independent Bernie Sanders a perfect example of being ineffective. Sanders has yelled and screamed about “Medicare for All” for 40 years with absolutely nothing to show for it.”

Hogg claims his vast experience he gained at Harvard University gives him the skills to reform the DNC much like Bernie Sanders has reformed healthcare. His degrees in International Studies and Theoretical Concepts of Doing Stupid Shit makes him a great candidate for getting nothing accomplished.

Welcome to Satire Sunday a day late.